I used to be the kind of person who put so much effort into friendships and relationships. I truly cared, right down to the bone and I never failed to show it either.
But, the treatment I received contradicted it all. I've always been thrown away, like I'm some disposable camera. Not a person, with feelings, who's given her all.
I became fed up.
I've stopped being the person everyone takes for granted because now I don't care. I care to an extent but I'm less prone to give second chances or *ahem* become your doormat. I'm outspoken and I always say what's on my mind, not that I didn't before but I was careful. Constantly walked on eggshells. I'm still a decent person but at times I feel like now I'm the one taking advantage of people. A complete role reversal, it feels nice to be in control. To live on my own terms and not wait around for someone.
That's not really working either. I need some balance.
2 comments:
I have had the same situation in the last year. I gave it my all and was thrown in the dirt.
Being independant feels so good.
But sometimes, I miss how completely happy I was.
Yeah, that whole "happiness" thing comes and goes for me and I can't seem to make it stay. I hate how temporary something like that is when it's supposed to be constant.
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